Self esteem is highly overrated. Adolf Hitler had high self esteem.
What good is it? Most of the people I have known who have HIGH self esteem have a truly over-inflated view of themselves. They are arrogant and have little feeling for their fellow man. Their ears are closed to any comment or suggestion that is in opposition to them and their mouth is wide open proclaiming their greatness.
Give me a truly good failure anytime. At least they have done something besides toot their own horn. Someone who has failed has tried. I am a failure at many things. Now I know that it is not a stigma to have failed.
Thomas Edison obtained 1,093 patents during his 84 years. If you do not think he failed many, many times, you know nothing of inventing. Not everything works the first time around.
I worked as a Network Administrator for more than 15 years. I worked with computers in general for more than 35 years. It was nothing in the early days of the desktop computer to format a hard drive or a disk without realizing it. It was those failures by users and inventors alike that lead to the lines of code that prohibit someone from formatting their hard drive or disk without asking a question, not once, but 2 or more times, "This action will format your hard drive. Do you want to proceed?" Of course, if you heard a co-worker shriek, you knew what they had done.
I installed a phone system for a company several years ago. Management did assume that I knew what I was doing and allowed me to do the job as I saw fit. I did not do it alone, there were several others who played a part. My job was mainly supervision. It went fairly smoothly. The company was down for a short time while components were installed. The same type of operation was performed again several years later. Management at this time was intent upon "saving money" and tied my hands in certain areas. Although they had no prior experience with a change of this magnitude, they chose to rely on their own limited knowledge and overrode my suggestions.
The system was down for several hours and there were a multitude of piddly problems over a period of a couple of weeks. Cost is subjective. If you want to spend the money, the sky is the limit. If you feel it is unnecessary, no amount of common sense will provoke you into seeing that spending that extra dollar will be a good deal.
Who did they blame? They blamed the one who installed it. It wasn't their fault because they wouldn't spend the extra money for the new equipment. No, it was mine for not being more relentless in my pursuit of warranting the extra cost. Persistence pays off, but how often do you take their abuse and question your own motives before you finally give up and let management have their own way?
How can you simply say that the next time I ask will be the time when they give me the OK? Or will that next time be the one where they say, again, "I told you how it was going to be! Why can't you just do as you are told?" I heard that, too.
So, I have failed. But I have tried. I have also succeeded. I will fail again and I will succeed again.
If you wake up feeling stupid, either try it again changing one small thing or try something else and get back to it later. If we are worth our salt, we will fail. Failure is only a reason to try something different or something new.
Wednesday, November 3, 2010
Two Brothers - A Political Commentary
The oldest brother was industrious. He worked from the time he could walk. He worked while he went to school. He worked summers. While he was working, he saved money for the things that he needed. He went to school after he graduated from high school and learned a valuable trade.
He served his country. He married. He had children.
The youngest brother was also industrious. He worked from the time he could walk. He worked while he went to school. He worked summers. While he was working, he bought the things he needed and wanted. He went to school after he graduated from high school and learned a valuable trade.
He served his country. He married. He had children.
So, why is this a political commentary?
They are both conservatives. They both believe in much the same thing but they each had their own way of getting that same thing.
The oldest brother saved his money that he earned, while the youngest spent his money that he earned. The oldest brother bought land and refurbished an old house that was on it. The oldest brother was careful with his money and saved a sizable amount for his retirement.
The youngest took his retirement money when the plan was discontinued and purchased a flashy vehicle simply because he wanted it. When he got paid he got what he wanted. He spent his money the way he wanted to spend it. He also got the pleasure of hearing, "Why aren't you more like your brother?" from his parents. His wife never said that. She just gave him that look (after the explosion).
Both brothers did what they wanted to do with their money. Why? Because this is a free country and they can do it. Just like the Parable of the Ant and the Grasshopper, they handled their wealth the way they wanted to handle it.
Should the government step in and fix things for the youngest brother because he did not save for his retirement? Should the government take away the "surplus" from the oldest brother and give it to the youngest just so they can be equal? I don't think so!
That is just downright stupid. But that is what socialism and communism are all about. They redistribute the wealth to make everyone equal in the end. And the end is where you get it. It's painful, too.
Redistribution of the wealth serves no purpose except to make the one who is less productive in the first place to become even less productive. The one who is productive eventually gets the same message. If you are not going to get anything more and if you do, the government takes it away, what is the point in putting forth more effort?
If you want the government to control your retirement, your health care, your junk food, your vitamins, your fiber, your hemorrhoids and any other aspect of your life they feel like you are too ignorant to handle yourself (like money in your pocket), keep voting in people who think you are a moron.
Or, you can vote those pea-brains out and get someone in who will let you keep your money and make your own mistakes so you don't have to live with their mistakes.
He served his country. He married. He had children.
The youngest brother was also industrious. He worked from the time he could walk. He worked while he went to school. He worked summers. While he was working, he bought the things he needed and wanted. He went to school after he graduated from high school and learned a valuable trade.
He served his country. He married. He had children.
So, why is this a political commentary?
They are both conservatives. They both believe in much the same thing but they each had their own way of getting that same thing.
The oldest brother saved his money that he earned, while the youngest spent his money that he earned. The oldest brother bought land and refurbished an old house that was on it. The oldest brother was careful with his money and saved a sizable amount for his retirement.
The youngest took his retirement money when the plan was discontinued and purchased a flashy vehicle simply because he wanted it. When he got paid he got what he wanted. He spent his money the way he wanted to spend it. He also got the pleasure of hearing, "Why aren't you more like your brother?" from his parents. His wife never said that. She just gave him that look (after the explosion).
Both brothers did what they wanted to do with their money. Why? Because this is a free country and they can do it. Just like the Parable of the Ant and the Grasshopper, they handled their wealth the way they wanted to handle it.
Should the government step in and fix things for the youngest brother because he did not save for his retirement? Should the government take away the "surplus" from the oldest brother and give it to the youngest just so they can be equal? I don't think so!
That is just downright stupid. But that is what socialism and communism are all about. They redistribute the wealth to make everyone equal in the end. And the end is where you get it. It's painful, too.
Redistribution of the wealth serves no purpose except to make the one who is less productive in the first place to become even less productive. The one who is productive eventually gets the same message. If you are not going to get anything more and if you do, the government takes it away, what is the point in putting forth more effort?
If you want the government to control your retirement, your health care, your junk food, your vitamins, your fiber, your hemorrhoids and any other aspect of your life they feel like you are too ignorant to handle yourself (like money in your pocket), keep voting in people who think you are a moron.
Or, you can vote those pea-brains out and get someone in who will let you keep your money and make your own mistakes so you don't have to live with their mistakes.
Observations on a Wednesday
I voted yesterday. My husband and I went to the polls together. Exercising your Constitutional rights should be mandatory, but because this is a more or less free country, we have the right to throw away our rights.
I talked to a friend I had not seen in a couple of years. In the course of the conversation, the question, "How are you doing?" was asked by both of us.
My answer could have been, "I'm unemployed because all of their companies are in dire financial straits." Or, I could have said nothing. I said neither.
We took the dogs to the vet this morning. If you want a maintenance free dog, get a mutt. Little dogs, especially pedigree small dogs are high maintenance and are badly inbred. Allergies, hip dysplasia, allergies, obesity, allergies and other things plaque our two little chihuahuas. Did I mention allergies?
They are cute little dogs and they are a lot of company for my husband and me. Especially if you like taking them out at 2:00 am.
We have a pit-bull. Sassy is a real sweetie. It is her picture I use on my Facebook profile. We have two other mutts that simply "showed up" a couple of years apart. They look like they were from the same parents. When the first one, Smokey showed up, it was nice to have another larger dog for Sassy to play with. When Daffy showed up, I wanted to put up a wanted poster and spay/neuter the dog parents as well as the dogs that keep popping out these fuzzy little puppies that get to be 50 to 70 pounds of pure dog.
All my animals get spayed or neutered. Except for the two little ones, all the dogs stay outside.
There was a female Great Dane that showed up one day. I quickly found a place for her about 150 miles away. The internet is a great place for finding all sorts of things. I checked on her once and was told that she was getting spayed, had put on some weight and they had named her "Pammie" of all things.
Tiny is our elderly cat. She was born in 1992. I brought her indoors during the cold winter (you remember when it snowed in south Mississippi) because she looked so close to death. She did not die. She got fat and contrary. There is a chill in the air and she wants in again this year. And yes, she will come in at least at night. I won't throw the old girl out in the cold. I know how it feels to be thrown away because you are not young and have some flaws.
I still miss that stupid job. I am still getting help for my depression and anxiety. I still get upset when I think about what happened this past spring. I have finished mourning the loss of dubious friends who only used me to vent their own problems, and whose offer of lunch was an empty offer. I am sorry that they are sick and suffering. I offered to help, but when there is absolutely no response, I know they, too, have dumped me without having the class to say so. I am still me.
I talked to a friend I had not seen in a couple of years. In the course of the conversation, the question, "How are you doing?" was asked by both of us.
My answer could have been, "I'm unemployed because all of their companies are in dire financial straits." Or, I could have said nothing. I said neither.
We took the dogs to the vet this morning. If you want a maintenance free dog, get a mutt. Little dogs, especially pedigree small dogs are high maintenance and are badly inbred. Allergies, hip dysplasia, allergies, obesity, allergies and other things plaque our two little chihuahuas. Did I mention allergies?
They are cute little dogs and they are a lot of company for my husband and me. Especially if you like taking them out at 2:00 am.
We have a pit-bull. Sassy is a real sweetie. It is her picture I use on my Facebook profile. We have two other mutts that simply "showed up" a couple of years apart. They look like they were from the same parents. When the first one, Smokey showed up, it was nice to have another larger dog for Sassy to play with. When Daffy showed up, I wanted to put up a wanted poster and spay/neuter the dog parents as well as the dogs that keep popping out these fuzzy little puppies that get to be 50 to 70 pounds of pure dog.
All my animals get spayed or neutered. Except for the two little ones, all the dogs stay outside.
There was a female Great Dane that showed up one day. I quickly found a place for her about 150 miles away. The internet is a great place for finding all sorts of things. I checked on her once and was told that she was getting spayed, had put on some weight and they had named her "Pammie" of all things.
Tiny is our elderly cat. She was born in 1992. I brought her indoors during the cold winter (you remember when it snowed in south Mississippi) because she looked so close to death. She did not die. She got fat and contrary. There is a chill in the air and she wants in again this year. And yes, she will come in at least at night. I won't throw the old girl out in the cold. I know how it feels to be thrown away because you are not young and have some flaws.
I still miss that stupid job. I am still getting help for my depression and anxiety. I still get upset when I think about what happened this past spring. I have finished mourning the loss of dubious friends who only used me to vent their own problems, and whose offer of lunch was an empty offer. I am sorry that they are sick and suffering. I offered to help, but when there is absolutely no response, I know they, too, have dumped me without having the class to say so. I am still me.
Discrimination is Alive and Well in South Mississippi Business
It is illegal to discriminate. Just ask any Human Resources Manager. Talk to any employment counselor when you apply for unemployment. Ask any business owner. Ask any employee or prospective employee. They will all tell you that discrimination is against the law.
But we all know better. We all know there are ways around the law. We know that from watching the news. There are ways around the law and lending institutions know it. Car dealers know it and anyone who does business knows it. We all know there are ways to discriminate without going public with it.
There are job openings filled everyday with people who are unqualified simply because they are men or because they do not need any special assistance. You know who those businesses are.
You have to walk in because there is no way a wheel chair is going up those steps unless you ask someone to help. Then there is the door that even a strong man has trouble opening. Even if you did get a job there, you could never go to the bathroom. The wheel chair or the crutches or the walker will never fit in the bathroom with you IF you can get it through the door.
You might say that it was an old office and they are doing the best they can. You would be wrong. The building is new. They built it that way on purpose. If you need any help, they simply do not want you and do not care if you know it.
Jobs are not publicly posted. If they are it is with a blind email address so you cannot walk to the door anyway and apply for a job. Unless it is a menial job of minimum wage no one but the right people will ever apply for the job. If you are not white and of a certain religion, you will never know that the job exists. That way you will never be not chosen because of your ethnicity.
If you are a woman, forget it. It does not make any difference what ethnicity you are. Not only will they not hire you for certain positions, they will compound the insult by bringing you on as contract labor.
What does that mean?
It means that you do not qualify for any benefits.
It means they do not have to pay their part of any insurance premiums for you.
It means that you must pay self-employment taxes.
It means that they are avoiding paying ALL employer taxes on you.
It means that you are not covered by their workers compensation insurance.
It means that they do not pay any workers compensation premiums for you.
It means that you do not qualify to participate in their 401K plan or their pension plan.
It means that they do not have to pay matching funds into the 401K for you.
It means you do not qualify for unemployment!!
You have no job security and you have no employee rights because you are not an employee. It is also tax fraud and/or tax evasion. And, oh my, that is illegal, too. You see there is a difference between contract labor and an employee. Contract Labor brings all their own tools to the job (that includes professional tools such as laptops) and do the work at their convenience. There may or may not be a written contract. An employee is told what to use to get the job done, when and where to do the work and precisely how it is to be done. You can go to the IRS and the NLRB websites and find out all about the differences. It is no secret.
In the sate of Mississippi you have the At Will employment law which basically means that either the employee or the employer can terminate employment at any time with no particular reason. Except that it cannot be in violation of State or Federal laws. It is much easier to prove discrimination than you may think.
Because a company that discriminates feels that they are above the law and can legally side-step these minor Federal Regulations, they commit stupid mistakes that are easily brought to light by someone who knows where everything is buried. What most companies do not realize is that the so-called professionals they have hired to ruin their companies are no more than penny ante crooks and ne'er do wells. They feed the owners a line of garbage about how they can use advanced technology, partnership with the right people and of course use stringent methods to hire only the right people.
How do they finally get caught with their pants down, (figuratively speaking, of course, unless there is sexual harassment as well)? While they are making room for the right people, they fire the wrong person. They terminate someone who has absolutely nothing to lose and does not care one whit about who gets embarrassed or what friendships might be lost. Friends will always be friends and embarrassment passes. Anyway, there are 49 other states to live in and a bunch of people yet to meet. They terminate someone who tried to tell them they were headed in the wrong direction. They terminate someone with ethics. They terminate someone who knows where all that info is buried long before the statute of limitations runs out.
When they know they are in trouble, they try to cover it up by attempting to insert things into the files that were never there. They try in vain to make a case against someone who always did far and above what was required. They try to cover their behinds and simply make it worse for themselves. They evidently have never heard of anyone doing the right thing because it is the right thing to do. So much for them and their testimony(?).
But we all know better. We all know there are ways around the law. We know that from watching the news. There are ways around the law and lending institutions know it. Car dealers know it and anyone who does business knows it. We all know there are ways to discriminate without going public with it.
There are job openings filled everyday with people who are unqualified simply because they are men or because they do not need any special assistance. You know who those businesses are.
You have to walk in because there is no way a wheel chair is going up those steps unless you ask someone to help. Then there is the door that even a strong man has trouble opening. Even if you did get a job there, you could never go to the bathroom. The wheel chair or the crutches or the walker will never fit in the bathroom with you IF you can get it through the door.
You might say that it was an old office and they are doing the best they can. You would be wrong. The building is new. They built it that way on purpose. If you need any help, they simply do not want you and do not care if you know it.
Jobs are not publicly posted. If they are it is with a blind email address so you cannot walk to the door anyway and apply for a job. Unless it is a menial job of minimum wage no one but the right people will ever apply for the job. If you are not white and of a certain religion, you will never know that the job exists. That way you will never be not chosen because of your ethnicity.
If you are a woman, forget it. It does not make any difference what ethnicity you are. Not only will they not hire you for certain positions, they will compound the insult by bringing you on as contract labor.
What does that mean?
It means that you do not qualify for any benefits.
It means they do not have to pay their part of any insurance premiums for you.
It means that you must pay self-employment taxes.
It means that they are avoiding paying ALL employer taxes on you.
It means that you are not covered by their workers compensation insurance.
It means that they do not pay any workers compensation premiums for you.
It means that you do not qualify to participate in their 401K plan or their pension plan.
It means that they do not have to pay matching funds into the 401K for you.
It means you do not qualify for unemployment!!
You have no job security and you have no employee rights because you are not an employee. It is also tax fraud and/or tax evasion. And, oh my, that is illegal, too. You see there is a difference between contract labor and an employee. Contract Labor brings all their own tools to the job (that includes professional tools such as laptops) and do the work at their convenience. There may or may not be a written contract. An employee is told what to use to get the job done, when and where to do the work and precisely how it is to be done. You can go to the IRS and the NLRB websites and find out all about the differences. It is no secret.
In the sate of Mississippi you have the At Will employment law which basically means that either the employee or the employer can terminate employment at any time with no particular reason. Except that it cannot be in violation of State or Federal laws. It is much easier to prove discrimination than you may think.
Because a company that discriminates feels that they are above the law and can legally side-step these minor Federal Regulations, they commit stupid mistakes that are easily brought to light by someone who knows where everything is buried. What most companies do not realize is that the so-called professionals they have hired to ruin their companies are no more than penny ante crooks and ne'er do wells. They feed the owners a line of garbage about how they can use advanced technology, partnership with the right people and of course use stringent methods to hire only the right people.
How do they finally get caught with their pants down, (figuratively speaking, of course, unless there is sexual harassment as well)? While they are making room for the right people, they fire the wrong person. They terminate someone who has absolutely nothing to lose and does not care one whit about who gets embarrassed or what friendships might be lost. Friends will always be friends and embarrassment passes. Anyway, there are 49 other states to live in and a bunch of people yet to meet. They terminate someone who tried to tell them they were headed in the wrong direction. They terminate someone with ethics. They terminate someone who knows where all that info is buried long before the statute of limitations runs out.
When they know they are in trouble, they try to cover it up by attempting to insert things into the files that were never there. They try in vain to make a case against someone who always did far and above what was required. They try to cover their behinds and simply make it worse for themselves. They evidently have never heard of anyone doing the right thing because it is the right thing to do. So much for them and their testimony(?).
Monday, November 1, 2010
Bullies - The School Kind
A father confronts his disabled daughter's bullies and, enraged, threatens their life.
Was he right in doing so? After all there were children on the school bus that did not do anything against her neither did any of them report the abuse. Neither did the school bus driver. The school did nothing to stand up for the little girl.
What would you do if someone bullied your child? What would you do if someone bullied and sexually harassed your disabled daughter?
I know exactly what I would do if I saw a child being abused in any way by anyone, including, their parents. I was abused and bullied and no one did anything. I handled it.
Abuse from relatives, including parents and step-parents, I just sucked it up and endured it until I could get as far away as I could. When possible, I tried to avoid it the best I could.
Bullying from other students was different. One of my step-mothers taught me to knock the stew out of someone who hit me first. My mother taught me if you are being picked on by someone bigger than you, act like nothing makes you scared. Then you schedule a fist fight and bring a crowbar.
Being a girl almost 6 feet tall since I was 13 has had its advantages. Having a little brother 4 years younger who was picked on had advantages also. Being tall gives one the impression of power. Standing up and looking mean at some twerp who is even a half-foot shorter can quash many an aggressive move.
I never liked to fight. I saw too much of it up close and personal. I knew what it was like to feel helpless and frightened. It is an awful feeling to know that you were going to be hurt and it might be bad.
I remember an incident when I was about 11 or 12. My little brother and I had been playing at a playground at the elementary school. When we started to go home, I saw some boys with BB guns. This wave of fear came over me and I tried desperately to hide it. They said something. I don't recall what it was because I was concentrating on getting away from there without one of us getting hurt.
We had to cross an open field to get home and I didn't know any other way around it. As we started walking, I heard them pumping their guns. I heard them laughing and shouting. Then I started hearing the BB's whiz past and hit the ground around me. One went between my legs as I took a step but I refused to run. I was afraid that I would fall and knew something worse might happen. I didn't know what BB's would do. I did know they killed birds and small animals. I had heard about boys getting an eye put out and maybe that is why I wouldn't look in their direction.
My mother picked a fight for me one sunny afternoon. My little brother came in and said that some big girls had taken his bike from him. She called me to come with her. She was going to get his bike back. The three girls were in the same grade I was. It was Bonnie, Judy and another girl. I was 5 foot 11 and none of them was over 5 foot. They were all wearing shorts or pedal pushers and looking tough. I had on a dress with ruffles.
The whole time my little family group is moving, my mother is steady asking, "Where are they?"; "Who are they?" and "Who do they think they are?"
We met up with them in the side yard of the apartment building. They were just a short way from the bike.
My mother asked them why they thought it necessary to pick on a little boy and steal his bicycle. Without giving them a chance to answer, she made the following statement and asked them a question.
"So, you think you're tough taking a little boy's bike away from him! Why don't you pick on someone your own size?"
It was her next question that made me wonder about my mother's mental stability. "If you want to fight with someone, fight my daughter. She'll take you on. One at a time or all at once."
I stole a glance at her and she never blinked. I took a deep breath and said nothing. I just stood firm and tried to look taller and stared at them. Was I scared? Of those three, one was getting a reputation for being a tough girl, smoking and fighting. Two of them had gone through grade school with me. The third one was one I thought was my friend.
To my surprise and relief they all said that I was too much bigger than they were and they all backed down and walked away leaving the bike behind.
My last school bully was a girl in high school in a Wheeling city school. She didn't like me from day one. She pulled my hair, wrote me dirty notes and whispered how she would kick my skinny butt any time she wanted to. Gym class was the worst. Every time she got a ball in her hand, it was headed my way. After about a week of relentless harassment, I'd had enough. I didn't know how or when, but I was going to return the favor. I started with the hair-pulling. I came up behind her and yanked on her hair. When she turned I smiled at her and then at the teacher standing in the stairway. That day at gym class, I made sure I got the ball and I made sure that she was on the receiving end. By the end of class, she had learned the fine art of ducking. We did not become fast friends, but we did manage to pass each other in the hallway without incident.
What I found out about bullies is they thrive on knocking down the weaker ones. They get some kind of high taking on the easy pickings. If you weren't easily controlled, they left you alone. They are a lot like hyenas looking for the slowest in the herd, waiting to devour them. I simply picked up the step and found ways to detour them.
Oh, don't get any ideas that I became a crusader for the underdog. I figured that it was everyone for himself. Unless it took place in front of me. Then I found a way to step in or at the very least create a distraction so the kid could get away.
No, I never told on anyone. That labeled you a tattletale and it just made it worse.
My next entry will be about corporate bullies. They prey on everyone.
Was he right in doing so? After all there were children on the school bus that did not do anything against her neither did any of them report the abuse. Neither did the school bus driver. The school did nothing to stand up for the little girl.
What would you do if someone bullied your child? What would you do if someone bullied and sexually harassed your disabled daughter?
I know exactly what I would do if I saw a child being abused in any way by anyone, including, their parents. I was abused and bullied and no one did anything. I handled it.
Abuse from relatives, including parents and step-parents, I just sucked it up and endured it until I could get as far away as I could. When possible, I tried to avoid it the best I could.
Bullying from other students was different. One of my step-mothers taught me to knock the stew out of someone who hit me first. My mother taught me if you are being picked on by someone bigger than you, act like nothing makes you scared. Then you schedule a fist fight and bring a crowbar.
Being a girl almost 6 feet tall since I was 13 has had its advantages. Having a little brother 4 years younger who was picked on had advantages also. Being tall gives one the impression of power. Standing up and looking mean at some twerp who is even a half-foot shorter can quash many an aggressive move.
I never liked to fight. I saw too much of it up close and personal. I knew what it was like to feel helpless and frightened. It is an awful feeling to know that you were going to be hurt and it might be bad.
I remember an incident when I was about 11 or 12. My little brother and I had been playing at a playground at the elementary school. When we started to go home, I saw some boys with BB guns. This wave of fear came over me and I tried desperately to hide it. They said something. I don't recall what it was because I was concentrating on getting away from there without one of us getting hurt.
We had to cross an open field to get home and I didn't know any other way around it. As we started walking, I heard them pumping their guns. I heard them laughing and shouting. Then I started hearing the BB's whiz past and hit the ground around me. One went between my legs as I took a step but I refused to run. I was afraid that I would fall and knew something worse might happen. I didn't know what BB's would do. I did know they killed birds and small animals. I had heard about boys getting an eye put out and maybe that is why I wouldn't look in their direction.
My mother picked a fight for me one sunny afternoon. My little brother came in and said that some big girls had taken his bike from him. She called me to come with her. She was going to get his bike back. The three girls were in the same grade I was. It was Bonnie, Judy and another girl. I was 5 foot 11 and none of them was over 5 foot. They were all wearing shorts or pedal pushers and looking tough. I had on a dress with ruffles.
The whole time my little family group is moving, my mother is steady asking, "Where are they?"; "Who are they?" and "Who do they think they are?"
We met up with them in the side yard of the apartment building. They were just a short way from the bike.
My mother asked them why they thought it necessary to pick on a little boy and steal his bicycle. Without giving them a chance to answer, she made the following statement and asked them a question.
"So, you think you're tough taking a little boy's bike away from him! Why don't you pick on someone your own size?"
It was her next question that made me wonder about my mother's mental stability. "If you want to fight with someone, fight my daughter. She'll take you on. One at a time or all at once."
I stole a glance at her and she never blinked. I took a deep breath and said nothing. I just stood firm and tried to look taller and stared at them. Was I scared? Of those three, one was getting a reputation for being a tough girl, smoking and fighting. Two of them had gone through grade school with me. The third one was one I thought was my friend.
To my surprise and relief they all said that I was too much bigger than they were and they all backed down and walked away leaving the bike behind.
My last school bully was a girl in high school in a Wheeling city school. She didn't like me from day one. She pulled my hair, wrote me dirty notes and whispered how she would kick my skinny butt any time she wanted to. Gym class was the worst. Every time she got a ball in her hand, it was headed my way. After about a week of relentless harassment, I'd had enough. I didn't know how or when, but I was going to return the favor. I started with the hair-pulling. I came up behind her and yanked on her hair. When she turned I smiled at her and then at the teacher standing in the stairway. That day at gym class, I made sure I got the ball and I made sure that she was on the receiving end. By the end of class, she had learned the fine art of ducking. We did not become fast friends, but we did manage to pass each other in the hallway without incident.
What I found out about bullies is they thrive on knocking down the weaker ones. They get some kind of high taking on the easy pickings. If you weren't easily controlled, they left you alone. They are a lot like hyenas looking for the slowest in the herd, waiting to devour them. I simply picked up the step and found ways to detour them.
Oh, don't get any ideas that I became a crusader for the underdog. I figured that it was everyone for himself. Unless it took place in front of me. Then I found a way to step in or at the very least create a distraction so the kid could get away.
No, I never told on anyone. That labeled you a tattletale and it just made it worse.
My next entry will be about corporate bullies. They prey on everyone.
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