Sometimes when you have the feeling that someone is out to get you, someone really is out to get you.
How do you know when it is real? How can you tell that the funny feeling in the pit of your stomach is reality and not just the burrito you had for lunch? How can you tell?
The truth is rarely told before the hidden is exposed to the light. Sometimes there are funny little things that happen which give you a glimmer of the reality. Most times though, you are dangling in the wind and wondering if you really have lost your mind.
Those are the times you must pray and rely on the Will of God to be shown to you. You cannot rely upon your own observations, the faulty advice of friends or those with their own agenda. Your own observations become flawed by the overwhelming sensations of feelings. Fear, repressed anger and flat out rage permeate your being until you no longer know when to trust your own instincts. Be still and wait upon the Lord is the only glimmer of hope in a twisted reality of work and more work.
Depression becomes a way of life and any attempt to work within the framework of a tangible reality is fraught with unknown perils. Life becomes unpredictable and pitfalls are found with every footstep. Tripping up becomes a way of life with no hope of change. And the beat goes on and on and on. The interminable ring of the phone is in a contest with the flow of people to the door of the office both with endless questions and requests for help, none of which go unanswered.
The depths of despair become endless pits filling up with the morass of the days' technicalities and frustrations overflowing each pit with the stench of Satan.
If you are one who feels stress at not completing each task then you are doomed to a daily dose of extreme stress and anxiety as the continuous flow of the moronic continues through the office. They afford you no chance at becoming contained and whole again as their every request compounds the weight upon your shoulders until the pulp of your existence becomes like a part of a recipe - "crush the nuts and sprinkle them on top of the cake." As you begin to feel crushed and scattered, another project is added with the urgency of life and death only to find out later, the project was a ruse to keep you busy while they trained someone to do your job.
It is then that the impromptu meetings acquire a new meaning since you were not invited. Your failure to attend a meeting was met with indifference because the one who would take over was, in fact, in attendance.
It becomes blatantly apparent that the emergency that arose to cancel a staff meeting was their intent to fire you and you know then that the paranoia is not just a feeling. It is a reality. And there you sit, face to face with someone lower than manure and one who is unable to grasp the situation in its entirety. He fails to realize that if it can happen to you it can happen to him.
The all you gave to a company who no longer cares is irretrievable. It is gone to the wasteland of the past. They have thrown you aside with all the care of used toilet paper, thrown down the gauntlet and dared you to do anything about it. Their inability to cover their own gluteus maximus is apparent as you sit silently waiting for the world to collapse around you leaving nothing for you to hang onto.
The Lord is gracious. When there is nothing to grab onto, He is there waiting with His hand out. He is waiting for you to reach out so He can show you the way. He leads you to the light and shows you the direction you must go. He leads you in the paths of righteousness. He prepares a table in front of your enemies. Be sure that vengeance is His and He will repay. Remember that because He is much better at getting even than you are.
There is no way that you can totally insulate yourself against someone else's desire to destroy you. You can only do the best job that you can and prepare yourself for the worst and hope for the best. The nefarious deeds of those who either willfully or inadvertently are used by Satan will one day be uncovered and bite them in the least convenient spot. In their eagerness to destroy you, they will be destroyed by their own lust and greed.
Keep the faith and do not give up. Truth is on your side.
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